Meanderings

Questionable Leadership Decision

On the calendar it says that tomorrow is a "Non-Contract Day" for teachers. This means that we are under no obligation to go to work. However, a critical training session for our new math curriculum adoption has been scheduled between 8:30 AM and Noon tomorrow morning. Since our participation is STRONGLY encouraged, is this truly an optional session? Could we forgo attendance and remain in our administrator's good graces?

I suspect that the day was structured in this way to meet budgetary restrictions; it simply costs the district less to timecard teachers than to pay for all of us to be on the clock for 3.5 hours. Nevertheless, it does not excuse the quasi-optionality of tomorrow's work session. It seems coercive to me to calendar a day as non-contract and then to schedule a critical path training session during that time.

Why They Come Here For Health Care.....

Many people believe that folks from other countries come to the United States for medical procedures because of our superior technology, highly trained doctors, or state of the art research facilities. All untrue.

The reason people come to the U.S. for medical care is that the procedures sound nicer in English than in their native languages. For example, would you rather have a procedure called a Rumplereemer or a routine prostate check? See the difference? A Rumplereemer sounds invasive and horribly uncomfortable, a routine prostate check sounds clinical and safe. Here's another example: Pflatzenbooben or mammogram? With the former, images of bench-vices and pancakes come to mind, with the latter simply charts and grayscale photos.

To make it all less intimidating, I think all medical procedures should be translated into meaningless French phrases so that they will always sound much nicer than they are.

Dr. Jones - Why are you here today Mr. Reyes?
Me - I am here for Le fromage de merde
Dr. Jones - Ok, I'll send you down to the technician.
Me - Thanks Doc. I'll see you next time.

See how smoothly that went? No discomfort, no nervousness, just a simple phrase that rolls smoothly off of the tongue. If every country adopted this proposal the foreign demand on U.S. health care would decline to the point that we could not only provide quality health care for all Americans, but hospitals could begin to offer punch cards for regular visitors. 10 surgeries and the next one's free or a free sputum tray with each ER visit.

Now that's health care reform that would actually work!

Unintended Consequences

Mercer Island School Board Policy number 2022 regarding the proper use of Electronic Information Systems reads in part, "By creating this network, the board intends only to provide a means for educational activities and does not intend to create a first amendment forum for free expression purposes." Can you do that? I mean can I publish a newspaper and say that this paper will not abide by the First Amendment? Or by publishing the newspaper (or providing an electronic network) do you, by default, create a First Amendment forum?

I don't know, but this is one I'll be digging into. Stay tuned. It may get interesting.

Yay, the War on Terror is Over!

Today the Washington Times reports today that the Obama administration has declared that the "War on Terrorism" is over and that the terms "jihadist", and "global war" are no longer to be used. These descriptors are now considered "simplistic" and "ideological" by the Administration which views itself as more 'nuanced' and 'practical'. An adminstration spokesman also lamented the "inflammatory rhetoric, hyperbole, and intellectual narrowness" that has, in the Adminstrations opinion, surrounded this issue.

What a load of elitist crap.

Referring to our ongoing operations as a Global War on Terror informs the jihadists that we will seek them out wherever they hide, and that we will kill them when we find them. Changing the vocabulary to something more 'nuanced' simply tells the terrorists that the Administration is being led by a bunch of sackless ivory tower asshats who lack the will to drop the hammer on them.

Mr. Obama, the way to stop terror is to kill the terrorists. It works every time.

Dr. Seuss Quote

A friend posted a quote on Facebook a little while ago that made me think a little bit. The quote is from Dr. Seuss and it reads, "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." I wonder what the good Dr. was thinking about when he made that comment. Could it have been.....

*The last episode of ________________
*Someone's marriage
*The plague
*Shock Therapy
*Grad school

I thought of many more, highly inappropriate responses, but thought it best to keep them to myself.